Rising

Completely moved into my new old house I am comforted by the fact that the work is nearly done and I am so pleased by the results. I have reclaimed this house from all the energy of my failed beta-ship.

I thought that I never felt more satisfied than the day I got engaged -- I finally had an answer to the question of where my life was going. I don't think I ever knew security that hard and fast and concrete and Absolute like that a single other day of my life. But, as it turns out, the best day -- the best feeling and the most satisfying -- was the day I got un-engaged and rose up out of me and my life into the limitless possibilities of becoming.

Being home in this new manifestation of me feels like home never has in all my life and this security -- in the rootedness and steadfastness of me being me -- is more real than any false feelings of hope and knowledge I felt in that other person.

I'm so thankful to have a second chance at everything and to really hear myself this time. To let my heart speak and honor what it says. It really is the evolution of my soul -- and it's so beautiful to experience.